Nidhi Jankal- Women really need to kick the habit of being a people pleaser.

“Being dusky since birth, I was an outcast. Fair and lovely was my best friend as a young girl. But soon this obsession leaned towards laser treatments and popping pills to look fairer. Between the age of 25-28, I had to meet 30 odd potential future husbands and had to dress up for and serve coffee to 10 strange men. I faced rejection due to my skin colour, my height, because I ate meat, consumed alcohol & to my surprise, because I was too qualified, as I was a PG in Architecture. There came a point when I had to withhold some information so that I don’t get rejected. This was also the time when I had started working out.
Eventually after 3-4 years of doubting myself and losing touch with my identity, I decided to get married to someone I met through a “broker”. At that point it seemed right. The wedding was hosted by my father, it was a beautiful affair, but eventually the marriage was not.
I moved to Australia soon after the wedding and since then, the journey was nothing short of a rollercoaster ride. I didn’t have work visa, so I was mostly cooking and taking care of the home but I decided to join a gym and also acquired a certification as a Coach.
After a month into the wedding, he started demanding for a house, car etc. I found this very unexpected. When I opposed the same, I was physically abused and locked out of the house for several hours. He even tried to confiscate my phone. Once, he dragged me out in the balcony and locked me outside, it was 6 deg celsius and I was in pyjamas. At this point something changed in me. I returned to Bangalore after 2 weeks & decided not to go back to Australia till I get a work visa and a job.
When I came back to bangalore, I started coaching at NAMMAxFit. I was told not to take up the job & head back to Australia to be with my husband, because a woman should just shut up & endure. But the voice inside my head stopped me.  I faced a lot of criticism for becoming a “trainer” and I soldiered through depression.

I believe in power of women and their trailblazing ideologies. Women really need to kick the habit of being a people pleaser. All you need is the courage to say NO! It’s not easy, but that’s why it’s worth it.”

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