‘When I was a teenager, at an age when people explore their sexuality, I was ashamed of my body. I avoided to even touch myself altogether. It didn’t feel good. At that age most of my friends had boyfriends, I didn’t. To be honest, I too desperately wanted to be in a relationship. I didn’t want a forever kind of love but I wanted somebody who could hold my hand, give me his watch to wear, pass me chits during class, comfort me by giving me his blazer when I was cold. At that time I thought, somehow having a boyfriend would make my life so much better and happier. The thought that no guy would ever date me was so daunting. I honestly thought I would die alone. If at all some guy showed interest in me, it was for an ulterior motive so that I could do their homework, lend them some money, or something totally stupid.
So, even though I was a typical girl who desired her fairy tale, I pretended to be a person who is extremely tom-boyish and is your ‘go-to bro’. My friends would spank me in the ass with their notebooks, or put their arms around me, and I would totally pretend to be this other person.
Things changed over a period of time. I stopped looking for a boyfriend. I started wearing confidence on my sleeves. Slowly I started buying clothes, applying makeup and started wearing heels because I enjoyed it.
Now, I can definitely say, you will find someone who will fall in love with you because of who you are, because of your lame jokes and your crazy ambitions or because you are the smartest girl he has met. And when you find him, you will know it because you wouldn’t have to pretend and he will love every bit of it.’ said Diksha Singhi @Delhi, India